We’re passionate about resilience because to develop true resilience takes both courage and compassion. What is a strong, healthy mindset?

It’s not toughs things out. Instead a strong and healthy mindset is one that can bend and flex with life’s obstacles. In fact the strongest of mindsets rises up to meet those stress and challenges and learns and grows from them. Which is really challenging these days, as we’re often over-tired and over-committed. Most of us can maintain a strong and healthy mindset when everything else in life is going well and we’re given one big challenge to deal with.

But what usually happens is life piles up. Suddenly we’re dealing with a pot boiling over on the stove, a large unexpected bill, a crucial presentation to deliver, and the news concerning someone close or others stuffs we care for. At its core, the foundation of a strong, healthy mindset is what you believe. This includes what you believe about yourself—and the world. Because what you believe impacts what you think, how you feel and how you approach any situation, problem, or goal.

Here are 7 beliefs that make up a strong and healthy mindset:

  1. I don’t know all the answers, but I’m willing and open to change.
  2. Life can be tough, but it all works out in the end.
  3. I am grateful for my life, and all that is in it.
  4. Whatever I feel is OK.
  5. I am always learning and doing my best.
  6. There are always options and alternatives.
  7. I can handle whatever life throws at me.

Let’s explore each belief, why it’s so important, and for each one you’ll find an easy exercise you can take into everyday life with you.

This week we take a look at the first belief below.

Belief 1) I don’t know all the answers, and I am willing and open to change.

This belief enables us to take whatever happens in our stride, stay open to possibilities and be flexible when handling change. As Gilda Radner said: “Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment, and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next”.

Let’s break this down.

Part 1) I don’t know all the answers

Are you willing to not know the answers? Willing to be wrong?

We can all think of times when we were certain that _____ was going to happen, and it didn’t. Or when we thought someone had let us down, but they actually didn’t—or had a crazy good reason we’d never have guessed.

Yes, not knowing (for sure) can be challenging. It means holding back judgement and being ready to be wrong. And it means being unsure or waiting to see what happens when what most of us want is certainty. It’s very human to want clarity. But there is so much power in not knowing too. Not knowing for sure, means there are always other potential solutions, ideas and reasons waiting in the wings to help us out. Another way to look at this is: Think possibility, not probability.

Resilience Exercise:  Think about a challenge in your life. Now answer consider these questions:

  • What don’t you know?
  • Where could you be wrong?
  • If I stop focusing on what I think is probable, what else is possible?

“Learning to live with ambiguity is learning to live with how life really is, full of complexities and strange surprises”. James Hollis

Part 2) I’m willing and open to change

How open-minded are you? How flexible are you really? Being open helps you handle change. Remember that things that don’t bend under stress, break. So when we flex, we’re stronger and more resilient.

That appointment that you were super-looking forward to get cancelled: Do you grumble? Yes. Do you STAY grumbly? Well, if you’re flexible, willing, and open to change you might say, OK, I could take advantage of this time to refine my ideas or advance some project, call a friend, meditate, go for a walk. There are so many options!

But whether it’s a big or small issue, the key is: Are you willing and open to changing your plans or your mind? Because life is a lot easier and less stressful when you are.

Resilience Exercise : Next time something happens that you don’t like:

  • First acknowledge the situation: That’s (e.g. annoying)_____. I feel _____.
  • Then ask:
  1. So, how could I go with the flow here?
  2. What new or alternative options does this now enable?
  3. What’s great about this change?

TIP: Start practicing this with small (easy) things first!

“When one door closes another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us.” Alexander Graham Bell

Remember: Resilience is a skill! So you can build a healthy resilience to make life easier—if you work at it, take care of, and believe in you.

Changing the world, Start with you!

Wishing you a resilient week 💪🏽